And so today I am officially down to one animal again. Lilly has grown increasingly "ill". I was so worried about her.....not playing, not eating, hiding a lot! Then one night about a week and a half ago she kept waking me up by running all over the place up things, down things, under things, and over them.....I was getting really irritated when I realized...she was trying to get away from Mylie. She just wanted to sleep, she's older, and she's used to sleeping at night. But 6 month old Mylie would not have it. I started paying closer attention and realized that when Lilly would try to eat...Mylie woud stop her...when she tried to drink...Mylie was right there. Poor Lilly is a one person cat...and she truly loves me the best she is able to....but adding another feline to the mix was more than she could take.

She's lived fine with Terriers, Lab mixes, and even a Chiuaua (sp?). She's fine with dogs...but there is only room for one cat around here I guess.

So today, bundled in a pink blanket...my beautiful gray kitten was sent back to the shelter I got her from. My friend Andrea went with me and as soon as I walk in the door I broke down. The lady behind the counter said...can I help you? To wich I responded with a sob and pointed to Andrea and said "talk". So Andrea started to explain...and the lady said..oh you're the one who called. Thankfully I had called early to explain why Mylie was being surrendered for adoption. The lady remembered and she said....it's ok. I filled out two forms and there you have it...they said we'll do the best we can and that was it.

I was so bummed but when I got home I was greeted by a bouncing happy Lilly. Now confindent in her position...and eating like a pig.

I will never forget that pretty little gray....I pray that she finds a great home...where she too will be queen bee.

I'm going to wait a year or two....then...I'm getting a dog. :-)

Remember When?

As children some of the first verses we learn are Proverbs 3:6&7. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

Yippee! Got it! Here we go, down the path....straight ahead, no bends, no forks in the road, or speed bumps. Better yet no slimy disgusting pits of the devil to fall into! Nothing but blue skies and smooth sailing. Trusting in the Lord and letting Him direct.

Woe wait a minute...that's not you're life? It's not mine I can tell you that. Bumps, bruises, friends that fail, plans that fall apart. People that disappoint. Sound slightly more familiar?

Ok now we're on the same page...so we say Trust in the Lord and He will direct you! It says so right here! Do it! Just do it! Huhu...how?

How do you trust God when you don't know what's coming, when you don't know IF anything is coming at all? When you've been beat up, pushed around and left for dead? Do you muster up all of the Spiritual Fortitude in your tiny little heart and go for broke? Do you blink three times, turn around and spit on the ground? Or how about click your heels together three times? Sorry...they're RED HEELS with sparkles on them! (Ha Ha)

So what's the magic words to make the Trust come flooding into the soul and restore peace, refreshment, and focus?

Think about this:

When Joshua was taking over the leadership of the Israelites he said "remember how God brought you out", when they crossed over Jordan he put up a monument so that they would "remember", over and over year after disappointing year the Israelites were called to remember what God had done for them in the past. And with each memory, strength was renewed, hearts revived, and TRUST restored.

So tonight I sit and remember.....how God got us down a mountain in pitch black...with no head lights then brought a complete stranger to our motel door to pay for the car repairs.

How a small bunch of country folk in a little teeny Texas village gave me and my brother birthday parities...even though they'd never met us.

How many times checks showed up in the mail right when we needed them. Or a big trash bag full Christmas gift showed up on the porch when things were tight.

I remember my parents going to Greenland and coming back with just about as much money as they'd left with. And stories about a little girl in Alaska that gave her heart to God when a man looking for a mission field showed up and preached.

I remember the hundreds of believers that prayed, gave, and encouraged. Many many more than the ones that tore us down and drove us away.

I remember, and I am amazed! I remember and I am ashamed. I want so badly for those certain relationships and people to accept me...and here I am.....accepted by the God of the universe. What is wrong with me?

I remember the strong men that I had the privilege to sit under and learn from. Many of those men got paid to teach preacher boys the stuff I was getting for free. Many a preacher boy had to pay tuition for the stuff I got all summer long.

So I thank Him for the mountains, and I thank Him for the valleys, I thank Him for the trials He's brought me through....cause if I never had a problem I wouldn't know that God could solve em' and I wouldn't know what faith in God could do! Through it all, through it all, I've learned to trust in Jesus and I've learned to trust His Power! Through it all, through it all, I've learned to depend upon His Word!

God's Blessing in Disobedient Times

When I was a little girl I used to constantly read the books of Ruth and Esther over and over again. We were encouraged at very young ages to try to get into a habit of individual reading apart from the family devotions. I was and still am a hopeless romantic. Cinderella was my hero! So I would read Ruth for the obvious romance and Esther because....well who wouldn't want to be queen and save the world?

Finally my dad told me, "Jaime, there are other books in the Bible...pick something else next time!"

So here I find myself once again going through a study in Ruth and Esther. It was chosen for the 12th grade girls at the church and we start it tonight. I get to start the lessons and I'm nervous. I'm always nervous because although I know the material, I don't know sometimes the best way to present it and what exactly the girls are going to need from it. I'm so glad God knows.

There is one over shadowing question in my mind. The amount of speculation that comes into play with the marriages of Ruth and Orpah to Mahlon and Chilion.

When the Elimelech gang packed it up and headed for the hills they were running away from famine, away from their land, their people....and their God. At first glance you think...the man's just providing for his family cut him some slack...but anytime that a Jewish individual took up residency in a pagan land, it was a picture that they were taking matters into their own hands and relying on their own strength. Essentially they were turning their backs on their God.

Disobedience Act 1: Elimelech decided that God could no longer care for his family and that he was going to need to do it himself. He headed to the land of their arch enemies...the Moabites. Unfortunately, trial followed him in Moab and he died there.

Disobedience Act 2: Weather or not the boys took their wives before or after their fathers death is not entirely clear. What is clear is that they shared their parents lack of respect for the God's laws and disbelief that God would provide. Soon after, they also died. Many speculate that their lack of trust and faith in God is what led to their death...this is not indicated in Scripture and can only be speculation.

The Blessing: So far Ruth is not such a wonderful fairytale aye? We have three men dead, and three widows without a penny to their names. Where is the blessing? Here, a picture of God's grace begins to peak through the clouds as Naomi decides to return home dejected, empty, and alone. In those last moments on the trail before heading down the mountain side Orpah leaves in tears. She's tasted of the God of Israel and all she sees is death and need. But then comes that beautiful speech...the speech so many now use as a picture of commitment in the wedding ceremony... Ruth says to Naomi, where you go, I will go, your people will be my people and your God my God! That is grace right there! God's grace! It is the testimony at the time of Ruth's conversion. She make the decision to follow God...to leave the world, her family, her friends, any chance of material possessions, all of it, behind her. She chooses to follow God....No Turning Back.

Does this mean we encourage disobedience. By no means....what it does mean is that even the stupid, faithless decisions of man cannot stop the work of Christ as He seeks and saves those who are lost. Either you will obey and follow Him and He will perfect His will in you and through you or you will decide to turn from Him and He will perfect His will in spite of you.

Choose to be a vessel of honor fit for His use!


Run with Patience
Heb 12:1
J~

I am a tea cup!

We went away this weekend on a youth retreat for the girls in our church. The name of this retreat is Daughters of the King or DOTK. They rent out some beach houses and take the girls to the beach for the weekend.

There were a lot of great lessons taught. Patti gave an illustration of a little boy who love sail boats, and so his parents bought him a sail boat model kit for him to build. It was tedious work at times but because of his passion for the object he kept working until it was perfect. The next day he took it out and put it in a stream near his home. He ran joyfully beside the river as his beautiful creation floated casually down stream. Before the boy had time to realize it thought the current began moving faster and faster carrying his boat farther and farther from him. There was nothing he could do. He stood there crying as his new boat drifted out of sight. The next day while walking past the toy store in town he saw a boat, HIS boat in the window. He ran inside and excitedly explained to the clerk that the boat was his, he had made it piece by piece...the clerk looked at him and said well boy, for $20 you can take it home. Sadly the boy did not have the money and the clerk forced him to leave without his treasure. Over the next week, the boy worked tirelessly doing anything and everything he could to raise the money to buy back his beloved boat, finally the end of the week arrived and he had enough to pay the price. He ran down town and into the store and threw the money up on the counter....sir, I'm here for my boat, I've paid the price. At last the little boy was handed his boat. He clutched it tightly to his chest as he walked out into the street. As he turned towards home the toy clerk over heard him speaking to the boat as he cradled it in his arms....he said...boat I made you, and I've bought you, you are twice mine!

The Lord of all creation made us. He new from the very beginning of time what we'd be, and who we'd be...but he didn't stop there, He also died to pay the price that we owe for our sins.

He created us, he bought us....we are twice HIS! :-)


The next wonderful story that I heard was that of a tea cup. It was a narration given from the perspective of a beautiful delicate tea cup. I will not attempt to recreate the whole story, it was beautiful and I know I'd mess it up. But the point of the story was this.

This tea cup started out as a clump of mud. After being gathered by the master potter it began a painful process of being beaten, softened, molded, shaped and fired, and then after it cooled is was painted and fired again....through each stage of the process the tea cup explained the terror and pain associated in the process. Many many times through out the ordeal it would plead with the potter, please, please leave me alone...it hurts to much. To which the potter would respond no, not yet, I'm not done yet. After each trip through the fire the tea cup would be set aside on a shelf to cool and each time the potter would reach for it again to perform another transforming step the tea cup would cry please, what will you do with me now? What is next for me?

Many many times, I've felt like that tea cup. Beaten, spinning in circles, and run through the fire of this life. Lonely, sitting on the shelf, wondering, waiting to see what comes next.....sometime crying out to God saying, God it hurts too much, what's next? What do you want from me? What will you do with me now? At the end of the story the tea cup was transformed into a delicate, beautiful creation! More importantly if became useful and needed. A treasure. We don't know what the fire is that we will pass through next....nor how many trips through the kiln we will face....praise our Heavenly Father! He does know, and He know why too! How Great Is OUR GOD!

Day by day and with each passing moment strength I find to meet my trials hear! Trusting in my Fathers wise bestowment I've no cause for worry or for fear. He whose heart is kind beyond all measure give unto each day what deems best lovingly it's part of pain and pleasure mingling toil with peace and rest.

Every day the Lord Himself is near me with special mercy for each hour, all my cares He fain would bear and cheer me He whose name is COUNSELOR and POWER! The protection of His child and treasure is a charge that on Himself He lays...as your days your strength shall be in measure this the pledge to me He made.

Help me then in every tribulation so to trust your promise Oh Lord that I lose not faiths sweet consolation offered me within your Holy Word. Help me Lord when toil and trouble meeting e'er to take as from a Fathers hand. One by one the days the moments fleeting till I reach the promise land.

Baseball Bats, Tazers, and Frying Pans

I've been living on my own for about 5 or 6 years now. Lonely at times but for the most part everything is pretty much going as should be expected.

This past Sunday evening.......all of that changed. I was walking out of my apartment and down the stairs to ground level.....it was about 5:45pm. I LOVE living so close to the church! Church starts at 6pm....and I wasn't even late!

So anyway this man was sitting near the bottom of the steps and as I passed by he looked at me....his face really red and eyes watering to the point of tears. He was probably in his late 5o's or early 60's so my first thought was heart attack. I asked him if he was ok.....to which he responded....no, no I'm not ok.

Now I will tell you that my first instinct was to say sorry about that and keep on walking.....but I immediately thought to myself "Self, you been praying for opportunities to reach out to the lost....so start reaching." So I asked the man, what was wrong and he said he was thinking about his past. Said that he'd done a lot of bad things in his life. So I said, Oh what brought that on. The man told me that he'd gone to church and that he's done some really bad things. So I told him that God would forgive that if he gave his life over to God....that Christ paid the price so that he could be forgiven from his sin and his past. He said no....not me, God won't for give me.....I started to explain that my God is an awesome, powerful God when he interrupted me to ask my marital status. Red lights flashed in my brain and the nagging feeling that had been tugging at me the whole time became to intense to ignore.....Get away and get away fast. So I simply told him that I had to go but that God could forgive his sin....was the only one who could if this man would put is trust in God......as I tried to turn to leave the man said that he'd killed people......so I simply thought....hhmmmm ok....got to go.....I told the man that the Apostle Paul had killed people simply for believing in Christ and today because of his belief in Christ he is in Heaven....I've got to go but I'll be praying for you. With that I walked away....a very brisk walk to my car. A few minutes later I was at church.

I talked to one of my preachers who said, call the police. I talked to our head of security who said that the man was probably just drunk but that I should be alert and keep my eyes open.....he gave me his card. I talked to another one of my preachers who told me to call him when I got home to make sure that I got home.

And then, I decided....pepper spray.....I'm getting pepper spray. So I began the research, no one sells it...but everyone is supposed to have it. Almost everyone I talked to said Walmart....Nope....they did have the portable blow horns though.....then I looked online....did you know they have pink tazers? Huh....but no....I wanted pepper spray.

Then starts the suggestions from friends and family......brother says get a gun....not quite ready for a gun...my friend Ashely.....her thoughts were the best...take a frying pan to bed with you....then you can cook him breakfast in the morning....HUM OK....then she said a good old fashion ball bat....good but still not the practical idea that I'm looking for. So I presented the issue of the missing pepper spray in study tonight. I was instructed how to hold my keys to create a sort of "brass knuckle" effect, I was told to install extra locks, and to make deliberate notice of all points of entrance on my home....thankfully there is really only one. Be alert, stay vigil, fight like a crazy women....nails, teeth feet. Kristine said "tazer him....just tazer him...I want a tazer...they're cool!" Ok so all the suggested registered the advise checked in....and prayer request made.....the best thing anyone could have ever said to me was this.

After study as we cleaned up and prepared to leave my friend Tara approached me and put a key in my hand. She said to me, trust your instinct, this is my spare key. If you ever, ever feel like you can't go into your home come to mine....don't even get out of your car. You know where I live.....you come right away....if I'm home or if I'm not....you come and wait.

Sometimes, all you need is knowing that you've got a place to go....and people that are taking you seriously, and taking you to the Father in prayer.


Isn't God Good?

Run with patience!
Jaime
Heb 12:1

I am and will be praying that God will be glorified in and through the new administration and that God will protect and empower His people to stand in the days to come!

I struggle, however, with grasping the historical buzz of the past few days. I understand that it was historical and I understand people are excited but to the height that it's reached? I don't get it.

Before you get upset with me....give me a moment to explain.

I honestly never notice race. The community I was born in and spent many years in was and still is a majority of African American population. In Youngstown and Warren white people seemed to be a minority. I heard people say all the time....don't look at what someone does or doesn't do based on the color of their skin. The color of ones skin doesn't matter, it's how they live......what they do, and how they apply themselves. So when a person achieved a certain level of success it always used to offend me when I heard them say things like, "yeah and he's African American too, so good for him!?!" What? And I guess that's what I've been hearing lately.....I just don't get it.

He's a man....just like, Bush, or Clinton, or Garfield...(no one is like Reagen :-D ) a man who became President. Prejudices have and will continue to exist...people have and will continue to overcome that as long as sin is on the earth.

Please, please, don't get me wrong. I do not minimize the terrors of slavery or prejudice. I know it was bad, real bad! I guess I just feel like all this talk about him making it to the White House and being black too......I don't know....it seems to me like it keeps the whole thing going and going. If I were him....I think I'd want people to talk about how hard I worked to get there, or the issues and plans I will begin to implement, not the fact that I am black. The fact that he's there in the highest office in the land....even if I like his moral beliefs or not.....is the accomplishment. Not the fact that he's a black man.

Again, I do not belittle the accomplishments nor the struggles that some have gone through....

We shout the praises of how far America has come in this issue....and I guess, I guess that's true....but I think our country will not really get past it until the color of ones skin truly is a mute point.

Oh Church Arise!

I love election season....the whole process thrills me! It always has, from the conventions, to the voting, to the irritatingly biased commentary.....I watch it all. Often I end up throwing things at my TV in disgust over a comment that is way off base, and this year was not different in many aspects.
But in one very huge aspect.....it was very, very different. I have prayed like I have never prayed over an election before! Today before I left for Bible Study I kneeled in my living room begging God to intervene once again on the behalf of my beloved America! I struggled to find words that would express a prayer that has been circling inside of me....and then the prayer came, Father, make your church ready. We are not ready, God we are stale and stagnant! Barely there, barely in the fight. God make us ready for battle.....because the time is near.
After Bible Study I rushed home and turned on my TV to see the familiar shape of my country big and bold on the screen, some states in red and some in blue. I settled in with a glass of O.J. and prepared myself for the long evening ahead. I didn't expect it to end so soon.
As I sat on the sofa and watched the color blue become more and more prominent, tears began to fill my eyes, at first slowly, and then like a rush! I could not believe what I was seeing. I fell on my face as the last states were called and the winner declared....I sobbed and I sobbed hard! My country had fallen. On my face in the middle of my living room I cried out to God. The verse in 2 Chronicles 7:14 kept ringing through my head....to which I replied, I know God...but America won't listen....they won't hear.
Then I pulled out my Bible and read the words to a verse I memorized as a child-"If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land." The words MY PEOPLE....CALLED BY MY NAME...they kept rolling over and over again in my head and then it hit me.
The fault lies with me....with the church of God....we are the ones who have turned from God to wickedness, we are the ones who tolerate a mediocre existence and those little "white" sins within the body. We are the ones that the call to repentance needs to generate with first. So I began to sing it...in the song that I'd learned...as tears continued to flow. If my people which are called by my name shall humble themselves, shall humble themselves and pray....then will I hear from heaven.....
The early leaders of the church lived unmistakably with the focus of the kingdom ever before them. They were on this earth for one reason and one reason alone. They were scattered abroad..preaching, Acts 11:19. They did not struggle with their purpose, their careers, and futures….they knew that they were there to make disciple for Christ….”baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost, teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you!” Matt 28:19-22. Preach, and teach and remember the Lord until He comes.
As the nest we have made for ourselves begins to rattle and shake, as the fibers we have so carefully woven become undone….let us look to the author and finisher of our faith. We need to begin to run once again like those who have gone before us, and run with patience the race that is set before us. Heb 12:1.
Make us ready Oh God for battle once again.....make us ready to fight, and worthy to stand. Take us once and for all out of the lull of sleep and the complacency of “Doubting Castle” and like the church fathers from Christ’s day, make us bold, able soldiers, ready and worthy to fight for the sake of the Gospel.
I am broken, but resting in the mighty arm of my Savior. Praying for deliverance, repentance, and strength for the body of the Lord Jesus Christ....the time has come, no, the time it well past due!
"Oh church arise and put your armor on hear the call of Christ our Captain. For now the weak can say that they are strong in the strength that God has given. With shield of faith and belt of truth we stand against the devils lies an army bold who’s battle cry is love reaching out to those in darkness. Our call to war to love the captive soul but to rage against the captor and with the sword that makes the wounded whole we will fight with faith and valor. When faced with trials on every side we know the outcome is secure and Christ will have the prize for which He died and inheritance of nations!!"

Looking for that blessed hope! Titus 2:13
Jaime