Bend in the Road

It's been so long since I've written. I actually kind of forgot I had this. I deactivated my Facebook account and sudenly I have all this free time at night....and I thought I didn't go on Facebook a lot. Boy, was I wrong!

So what's new? What's new? Alot and nothing at the same time. Work is still work....between you, me, and the dog sleeping on my feet...I am miserable there. I tread onward praying for my "bend in the road". I think I know when that bend will come...April 2011. I have made the decision to move back to the Ohio/Pa area. Why do I list both? Because more than likely I will be jumping over the boarder quite often. My parents live just a few moments from the Pa line.

I am sad to leave NC. I will miss the heat, the sun, my irratic hair brained friends....ok this is sounding too much like a Twilight novel...no seriously I will miss the area...it's really pretty here. I will miss my friends..the small little group of ladies that God has blessed me with the past few years. I wish I can take you all with me. So you may ask why are you going if you are so sad to leave? A few of you may list 8 very monumental reasons. You'd be right....but not entirely. I love my family and I am lonely here more often then not....but that's not why I'm going...entirely...though Josiah crying on the phone does have a big part of that.

I realized something this past year that has been poking at me for a long time. I have been living in neutral. "Lady in Waiting" should have been the name of the blog for so long. I've been praying and hoping that God would bless me with a husband and children of my own. With that prayer in my heart I kept telling myself...it doesn't matter that your job makes you miserable, it doesn't matter that you would almost...ALMOST...hug your boss if he fired you tomorrow. It doesn't matter because..."ONE DAY YOUR PRINCE WILL COME." and then none of this 8-5 terror will seem important. Not that I thought I'd get to quit working right away. I'm fine with working until I have kids. But I thought it would be easier if I had someone.

Well a few months ago....I woke up. I'm 32. Yes, I still want to get married. Sometimes, I believe he might even be out there. The point is...I'm done waiting. I need to live my life. I know that my true vocation is to honor and glorify God and to proclaim Him to a lost and dying world. I know that you can and should do that with every job you take on. Lately I'm praying so hard just to make it through the day without shaming Him with my attitude that I have little concentration for anything else. So I've decided to pursue a long time passion of mine. Baking....note there is no "n" in that word. I love experimenting, learning new techniques and inventing new recipes. I love it so much that I want to do it for a living. So now you're saying...well don't they eat sugar in NC? Yes they do....but I will need to take such a pay cut to begin at the bottom and work in a bakery to learn my skills. (num chuck skills, computer hacking skills) anyway...I'm not going to be making enough to support myself. So I am moving back in with mom and dad.

I'm nervous about it...sure...I am so set in my little secluded way that I'm nervous about the stretching I'll need to do. I am excited though that I can do this.

So please pray for me over the next 9 months:

1.) For a clean transition from Carolina to Buckeye. From single gal to...shoot..one bathroom 3 people.
2.) For a job.
3.) For clarity.
4.) For the friends I will be leaving behind.
5.) For any preparation that I can do now before I go.
6.) For so much that I cannot put into words.

I leave this in the Fathers hands and with excitement...and a tear....and though sometimes I am tempted to take it back out of His hands and worry over it just a little more I trust that He knows my path. He knows when I wake and when I sleep. He knows what I need and what I don't need. He is my peace and He has broken down every wall. I look forward to the bend in my road.